Written by:

Zerayn D.

there’s nothing to forgive, I live, I live
I do not regret speaking up, I give
I wasn’t loud, I kept it low,
I sneaked out the battlecry, soft but so

then it cost me all the decade work,
it cost me my bread and butter, my perk
it cost me my narrative, rewritten to lies,
truth buried deep beneath disguise

but the greater sadness, cutting through,
it cost me and it cost me you
to move apart, torn at the seams,
beyond great mountains and distant seas

we stopped holding hands, let it slip,
we stopped the warm hugs, lost the grip
you can’t look at me in the eyes,
you distance yourself with silent replies

you treated me like a stranger in the breeze,
as if my presence carried disease

I was threatened, I was alone,
I was isolated, cast from home
day and night were full of anxiety,
wondering what tomorrow would be

from today to shadows I cannot see,
my eyes dried out from shock and plea
for what influence drove me here,
for what advice tore me from near

I had fear like never before,
my mind grew restless to its core
I’m losing friends and alliances,
I’m not myself in these defenses

but i’m still here, I did not give up,
though life has drained me to the cup
my soul is awaken now, I see,
dont give up yet, don’t give up on me

I’m striving to stand, though I kneel,
I’m doing my best to heal

please give me time, it’s too much to take,
hear me out for my own sake
don’t ditch me in this fragile state,
before it hardens into hate

you will suffer my rage if you turn away,
if you leave me lost in disarray

but if you are now letting me go,
as early as now, then I’ll go
and never turn back to remember you,
erase the past we once both knew

oh tomorrow, embrace me now,
it wasn’t my fault, I don’t know how
I thought it was good, I stood my ground,
even when silence was safer sound

again, I do not regret to speak up,
to raise my voice, to fill the cup
this is what I want to do,
to stand in truth, to see it through

I’m a whistleblower, hear my call,
I’m your brave speaker through it all
I did not lose this battle’s thread,
I am winning ahead, though you’ve fled